At a stop where I have a couple of minutes to kill, a bum comes on board. He's carrying, what seems to be the entire 1987 Sears womens collection. He pulls a pepto bismal pink coloured sweatshirt out of the massive bundle and offers it to me. "Sorry, but bubble gum isn't really my colour." I say. "But you could wear it over your uniform. It'd match perfectly." he replies. "Look, I prefer to NOT buy my clothing off the street" I state. "You're not buying it off the street. You're buying it from me at the bus stop." he replies. "Here's my final offer. NO!" I say.
Dejectedly he wanders around the bus picking up bits of paper and used transfers. As he comes back up to the front he leans down and picks up a newspaper in front of the farebox. Suddenly he grabs my ankle and asks "Are those stars on your socks?" "Don't touch the driver" I exclaim. "I just want to see your socks" he says. "Let go of my ankle NOW or you'll leave this bus missing an arm" I threaten.
Standing in the doorway he shouts "You're a fuckin' bitch!" "You've been talking to my ex-boyfriend, haven't you?" I reply.
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